Releasing Our Grief
From Brokenness to Blessing

Gary Combs ·
August 13, 2023 · beatitudes, grief, recovery · Matthew 5:4, John 11:17-44 · Notes

Summary

For many of us, we don’t know how to grieve. We don’t know how to mourn. So, we just bottle it up. We deny it. Or we try to medicate it with booze, or pills, or overeating, or over-working, or materialism or… But the pain remains. Unresolved grief can cause us to give up on happiness.

The blessed life, the supremely happy life, is ours when we are willing to admit that we’re powerless to change, to overcome our hurts, habits, and hangups. And that we need to mourn, grieve, and trust Jesus as the only One truly able to comfort and heal us. In the gospel of John, Jesus called those who were grieving the death of Lazarus to believe in Him as the only One who could truly comfort their grief and turn their mourning into blessing. We can release our grief to Jesus to receive His comfort.

Transcript

Below is an automated transcript of this message

(Testimony video by Donnie Bradley, Pastor Gary Comb’s younger brother.)

Good morning, church! We’re continuing our sermon series this morning entitled, “From Brokenness to Blessing.” We are going through the eight Beatitudes of Jesus, found at the beginning of His Sermon on the Mount. Last week, we covered the first one, which is “Blessed are the poor in spirit, the spiritually powerless, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” The first step on the road to moving from brokenness to blessing is admitting that we are broken and helpless; we are powerless without God’s help.

That’s what my brother, Donnie, was talking about in that video that we have just watched. It was taken with an iphone at a little church up in West Virginia. My brother had been given a choice by a judge, a judge that he had stood in front of, many times as a police officer as an arresting police officer; on this day, though, he stood there as one accused. The judge said, “I’m either going to put you in jail for so many years or I’m going to send you up to West Virginia to this Adult Teen Challenge program for fourteen months. Which one do you want to do? Donnie says to the judge, “give me the program.” He was with a group there. In the video, you could see the men all dressed alike in their blue shirts.

Last week, I mentioned Donnie and how he had lost his family, his career and found himself in a jail cell. Ultimately, this Adult Teen Challenge program was where he really found the Lord. He knew the Lord, but here is where he really found Him and really wanted to follow Him. Donnie had a dream that he would get to share his testimony in our church. He never got to come in person and it was hard for me to watch that video. He passed away, he “graduated to heaven” this past September.

I wanted you to see my little brother’s testimony because it’s a great introduction to the second Beatitude, our second blessing today, which is “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.” People have asked me, “Gary, how do you do such things? How do you get up and preach after watching your brother’s testimony?” It’s because God told me to. I’ve already mourned, but watching it just now, I felt the sadness again. I’m giving it to Jesus; He comforts me. That’s how you can, too. You can “pour it out.” You can be honest with Jesus.

He says, “Blessed are those who mourn.” The word , “blessed,” could be translated “supremely happy.” The Greek word has the idea of “to the max,” “happy to the max,” “blessed to the max,” “completely content.” Jesus surprises us, by not saying it as the world would say. The world would say, ‘Blessed are those who are happy,’ but Jesus says, “Blessed are those who mourn.” He turns worldly wisdom upside down. The truth is, you can’t receive comfort until you mourn a thing. Another translation translates it like this, “They are blessed to grieve, for God will comfort them.” That word, “mourn,” could be translated, “to grieve” or “to lament.” So basically, Jesus is saying that mourning, that releasing our grief, puts us in a position for God to comfort us. You have to admit that you are hurting. I have to pour it out to receive comfort.

The truth is, though, most of us don’t know how to grieve. We don’t know how to grieve. The way that some of us do it is we “bottle it up.” We put it in a room, lock the door, turn the deadbolt and say to ourselves, I’m not going to look at that anymore. I’m not going to look at what I’ve lost. I’m not going to think about the person I love that I’ve lost. I’m not going to think about my broken marriage that I’ve lost. We try to lock it away.

One way we deal with grief is denial; another way is we medicate it. We try to cope with it through medication. My brother got caught up on using prescription pain pills. It started with a legitimate injury, as he said, but then it turned into something he was using to cope with life. For some of us, it’s booze. For some of us it is overeating or undereating or it’s buying stuff we don’t need. We think, If I own this, if I own that, if I buy this, if I buy that, then I’ll feel better. We medicate our pain, but the pain remains unresolved.

Grief can cause us to give up. Some people just decide, ‘You know what, I’ll never be happy again. I’m just going to accept it.’ We say things to ourselves like this, I gave up on happiness the day my husband left me. I gave up on happiness the week I lost my job. It was my dream job. Now I’m working this nothing job. I gave up on happiness when my parents split up. I gave up on happiness the night my dear mother died. Some of us just give up on happiness; we decide to live in bitterness. I’m talking about believers. I’m not talking about people who don’t believe in the Lord. They’ll just say, ‘I give up. I’m just going to wait for Jesus to come and get me. Then, there’ll be joy on the other side, but in this life, apparently there is no more joy.’

What about self-inflicted hurts? You heard, in the video, what Donny said. He said, “I lost my family. I lost my career. I lost any self-respect that I ever had.” What do you do with those self-inflicted hurts? How are you supposed to grieve this when you did it to yourself?

It begins by mourning. The comfort can’t come until you grieve the loss, give it to the Lord and release your grief to the Lord. No more medicating it, no more denying it, but releasing it. That’s what we’re talking about today. The blessed life, the supremely happy life is ours. When we mourn before the Lord, we “pour it out” and let the comfort fill us up.

As we “unpack” this second Beatitude, I can think of no better story to illustrate it than the story of Jesus raising Lazarus from the grave. Let’s go to that scripture today. Let’s look at the book of John, chapter 11 and see how this story perfectly illustrates the the Beatitude that says, “Blessed are those who mourn for they shall be comforted.” Jesus called those who were grieving the death of Lazarus to believe in Him as the source of their true comfort. I believe today, we can look to Jesus, we can cry it out, mourn it out, weep it out, all to the bottom of the drags of it and then receive His comfort.

As we look at the text today, I think we’ll see three steps towards receiving that comfort through releasing our grief to God. We’ll start at verse 17 of John, chapter 11:

John 11:17-44 (ESV) 17 Now when Jesus came, he found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb four days. 18 Bethany was near Jerusalem, about two miles off, 19 and many of the Jews had come to Martha and Mary to console them concerning their brother. 20 So when Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went and met him, but Mary remained seatedin the house. 21 Martha said to Jesus, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But even now I know that whatever you ask from God, God will give you.” 23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” 24 Martha said to him, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, 26 and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?” 27 She said to him, “Yes, Lord; I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who is coming into the world.” 28 When she had said this, she went and called her sister Mary, saying in private, “The Teacher is here and is calling for you.” 29 And when she heard it, she rose quickly and went to him. 30 Now Jesus had not yet come into the village, but was still in the place where Martha had met him. 31 When the Jews who were with her in the house, consoling her, saw Mary rise quickly and go out, they followed her, supposing that she was going to the tomb to weep there. 32 Now when Mary came to where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet, saying to him, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” 33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. 34 And he said, “Where have you laid him?” They said to him, “Lord, come and see.” 35 Jesus wept. 36 So the Jews said, “See how he loved him!” 37 But some of them said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying?” 38 Then Jesus, deeply moved again, came to the tomb. It was a cave, and a stone lay against it. 39 Jesus said, “Take away the stone.” Martha, the sister of the dead dead man, said to him, “Lord, by this time there will be an odor, for he has been dead four days.” 40 Jesus said to her, “Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” 41 So they took away the stone. And Jesus lifted up his eyes and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me. 42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this on account of the people standing around, that they may believe that you sent me.” 43 When he had said these things, he cried out with a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out.” 44 The man who had died came out, his hands and feet bound with linen strips, and his face wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said to them, “Unbind him, and let him go.” This is God’s word. Amen.

We’re looking for three steps on how to release our grief to Jesus to receive His comfort. Here’s the first step:

1. Believe in Jesus as the only source of true comfort.

Believe in Jesus as the only source of true comfort. We begin the story with Martha. Practical Martha. In fact, you could divide this story into three characters. The first, being Martha, the second, being Mary and then, finally, Lazarus. We’ll look at these first few verses.

Practical Martha has been waiting for Jesus. She rushes out to greet Him before He even comes into the village. She must have had someone out there watching for Him. They had sent word to Him that Lazarus was sick and they wanted Jesus to come, but Jesus delayed in His coming. She’s not weeping. This is Martha; she’s the first born. She’s the oldest child. She’s practical. The way she’s handling her grief is she’s staying busy. She’s not weeping. She’s doing the right thing. She probably planned the funeral. She may even have cooked the meal and invited guests to bring certain aspects of the meal. She’s an organizer. She’s very practical. It actually helps her to stay busy and not face the fact that her brother has died.

She’s not only practical, but she believes the right thing. She’s a good believer. Jesus says to her, ‘Do you believe in the resurrection? Do you believe that he can be raised?’ and she says, ‘Yes, Lord. I believe. I have good eschatology. I believe in the last days when You come again, that all you know will be raised to life.’ She thinks right. She does right, but she has this little thing in her soul and she opens with it as she greets Him, as soon as she sees Him. She says in verse 21, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” She didn’t say it with tears. I think she’s already forgiven Him, but she’s hurt. She’s “bottling it up.” She likes to be in control.

If I were to relate to one of the three characters in this story, I would relate to Martha the most. I am like that, too. I don’t like to lose control, but God’s constantly allowing me to lose control. The illusion of control was removed when my brother Donnie passed away last September. I organized the funeral. In fact, I preached at his funeral. I went to the grave site and to the funeral home. I led with my other brother and my sister and we went to make the arrangements. I’m the practical organizing elder brother. It’s part of how I grieve. I have to say that doing those things are helpful to the griever. I’m doing these last things. It makes me feel useful.

Yet, I have to deal with something deep inside of me. Why Lord, after he got clean? After he was on the right track? After he wanted to give his testimony in churches. He’s only 52. I’m the older brother. I’m 65. I’m supposed to go first, not him. It’s ok. I want you to hear this. It’s ok. You’re thinking, Pastor, we don’t think we can come to your church anymore now that we realize what a mess you are. Well, maybe you can find one where they have perfect people, but please don’t join it. You’ll mess it up.

What I’m working out here is I’m being honest with God and God is not afraid of my honesty. He invites it. I’m telling Him, ‘I don’t understand this, Lord, but I still believe in You. I need to cry out to You. I’ve done plenty of that and He’s helped me. He comforts me. I don’t know all the answers because He doesn’t have to give those answers to me. He’s God and I’m not, so I trust Him and I believe in Him.

I think that’s kind of where Martha is. She’s got more believing and growing to do in her faith. She doesn’t fully know who Jesus is.

Listen to how Jesus talks to her; He says in verse 23, “Your brother will rise again.” Martha gives Him the good theology in verse24, “I know that he will rise again in the resurrection on the last day.” She has good theology. Then, He says to her in verse 25, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live,” Literally in the Greek, it’s the emphatic use of “I am,” which, in Greek, is “egō eimi.” It’s where we get the word, “ego.” He says, “egō eimi.” I am the resurrection and the life.

Why is He doing this? John shows us seven times that Jesus does this. There’s seven “I am” statements in the book of John: I am the bread of life. I am the light of the world. I am the way, the truth and the life…You look him up. There’s seven of them and this is one of them.

Why is he doing this? He’s claiming to teach us something. He says, “I am God.” This is the name that God gave Moses. Moses asked, “What’s Your name?” and Jesus replies, “I am that I am,” which is “Yahweh” in Hebrew. It means “I will be eternally self-existent, present and timeless.” “I am.” That’s His name.

He says to Martha, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, 26 and everyone who lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?” That’s what the whole book of John is about –for us to fully believe who Jesus really is, that He’s the Son of God, the Christ, and that wherever He is, death has to run.

Martha says, “Yes, Lord; I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who is coming into the world.” She says she believes; I think she does as far as she’s able. She believes, but she’s gonna believe more before this story is over. Jesus is what she needs right now; Him personally is what she needs. The comfort that she needs is Him.

In 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (ESV) we read this, 3 “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction…”

We looked to a bottle, we looked to medication. We’re the most medicated people that have ever lived on planet earth. We look to some business. Martha is not looking to hide it so much, through medication or something else. She’s hiding it by staying busy. We all have our ways of coping, but Jesus says, “Blessed are those who mourn.” Blessed are those who just go ahead and cry it out and say, ‘I believe that You’re my only comfort. I give up on trying to comfort myself, coping with it myself alone. I’m calling out to You. You’re the only One who can comfort me. You’re the God of all comfort.’

Jesus promised this in John 14. He’s talking to his disciples. He says in John 14:16-18 (KJV) “And I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter, that he may abide with you for ever; even the Spirit of truth… I will not leave you comfortless: I will come to you.”

Another meaning would be to bring a comforter, one like Jesus, but different than Him; speaking of the Holy Spirit. He says, ‘I’m going to give you a comforter that can live inside of you. It is the Spirit of Christ, the Holy Spirit, so you can always pour it out to Him.’ You can see that I don’t understand why this happened, Lord, but I believe in You. Would You comfort me? Lord, this really hurts. Just cry it out instead of bottling it up, trying to hide from it, locking it away or denying it. Just pour it out.

Martha handled her grief her way. We all grieve differently. We go through phases. Some have identified them as denial, depression, anger or acceptance. There are these stages and we cycle through them over and over again , but in order to have good grief, to experience this blessing is to pour them out to the only one Who can comfort us.

Some of us live in the past, constantly thinking about what we have lost. We grieve. It. Give it to Jesus, believe in Him and trust Him for comfort. Move on; stop living in the past. You can’t change it.

We talked about this last week– I am powerless to change my past, so give it to Him. Go ahead and cry it out. I’m not saying to pretend like it didn’t happen because that’s denial. No, grieve it. Say, ‘Man, that hurt Lord, but I’m here. You must have a purpose for me. You promise comfort to those who mourn. I’m mourning to You. I’m lamenting. I’m crying out to You.

Martha has her way of mourning. She stays busy. She organized the funeral and the burial. She picked out the stone that was rolled in front of the cave. When will she grieve?

When will you grieve ? Where do you look for comfort? Stop looking and believe in the Comforter. His name is Jesus. He wants to comfort you.

As He stood over the city of Jerusalem, He said in Matthew 23:37, “O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones those who are sent to it! How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you were not willing!

Now, we move to a second character. Her name is Mary and she has some trust issues, which leads us to the second step of grieving, so that the Father can comfort us, so that the Lord can comfort us.

2. Trust in Jesus as the One who truly loves and understands.

If Martha was full of words, Mary was full of tears. They couldn’t have been more different, could they? Martha deals with life through the “head gate,” but Mary deals with life through the “heart gate.” Martha is a “head girl,” but Mary is a “heart girl.”

This is kind of out of character for Mary if you think of some other stories about Martha and Mary. Do you remember the story where Martha is in the kitchen and all the disciples have showed up at her house again, not one of them has any food with them. She had to go out to the market, buy all of this food and then return to cook it. Where is Mary? Mary has slipped off again. She’s sitting in there with the men folk at the foot of Jesus, listening to Jesus teach. Martha comes in; the Bible doesn’t say it, but I visualize with her hands on her hips. She says, ‘Lord, tell Mary to come in the kitchen and help me. I’m in there working, trying to make lunch for you people. Jesus says to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed and Mary has chosen what is better.” That’s Mary. Mary has chosen what is better, but not on this particular day in today’s scripture. This day, “heart” Mary, who’s good at turning on the tears, cries easily, but that doesn’t mean her grief is the grief God wants of her because she might be crying and still hanging on to an accusation. Let’s see how she greets Jesus. Let’s just think about how she greets Jesus.

If we go back early in the story, we see that Martha, in verse 20, heads out to meet Jesus. She sees that Jesus is coming. In contrast, it says, in verse 20, “but Mary remained seated in the house.” Mary is pouting because she’s a ”heart” girl. Here is Jesus; He’s late for the funeral. Lazarus has been in the grave for four days. The Jews, within 24 hours, dealt quickly with the deceased. Lazarus has been dead for four days now. They’re going through a week of grieving. Jesus was late to be there; to heal Him because he was sick. They sent word to Jesus when Lazarus was sick. He didn’t come. So, Mary greets Jesus the same way Martha did, except it seems to have a different feel about it. Mary’s words to Jesus are verbatim to Martha’s words. It seems that the sisters have been talking. “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” Martha says it without tears and it just seems like a practical fact, but Mary says it through tears that feels different – Lord, why weren’t You here?

Do you ever talk to the Lord like that? Lord, why did You let this happen to me? If only You had been here. You can tell that the girls have been talking about it together because the mourners that are around them have overheard. Because of what they said in verse 37, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man also have kept this man from dying?”

We release grief by blaming. We blame others. We blame God. ‘… if you’d only have been here, this wouldn’t have happened. Why did you let this happen? Why me, Lord. Why did You let this happen?’

This is Mary. Mary has a trust issue here. She trusted Jesus, but now she’s not so sure. Look how Jesus responds. Look at His response. This is the God of the universe. He sees her coming, in verse 33, “When Jesussaw her weeping, and the Jews who had come with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled.”

What moved Him? What was He greatly troubled by? Look at verse 35, “Jesus wept.” This is the shortest verse in the Bible. He understands us when we cry. He’s moved by our tears. When we have a loss, He feels it. You can trust Him. He’s not a distant transcendent God. He’s imminent and present and He’s present this morning. You can trust Him. He knows your pain. He has felt what you felt. He’s well acquainted with our grief. You can trust Him. Mary needed to see that.

There’s some unusual language here; unusual in the sense that it’s not the way people usually respond to grief. I wanna “unpack” it for a second and just think about it with you. When Jesus saw Mary weeping and the Jews weeping, He was deeply moved in his spirit and greatly troubled. The Greek underneath this is unusual. it means, literally, “to snort with anger like a horse,” to make an audible mumbling kind of sound. Jesus sees them weeping. The Greek word for “weeping” here is “wailing,” so, it’s not just tears. It’s other sounds; they’re wailing and they’re coming towards Jesus. As they come towards Him, he makes this sound.

John, who was always right next to Jesus everywhere they went, heard the sound from Jesus. Jesus is distressed. He’s disquieted. He’s agitated. He is displeased by what? Life hates death and Jesus is life. He hates what death has brought to His people that He created. He hates it. That’s one possibility. They think He’s crying and weeping because He loved Lazarus. Look at what they say down there in verse 36, “See how he loved him!” They think He’s mourning over the death of Lazarus,but He’s not worried about that . He’s life; He’s resurrection and life. He’s about to raise Lazarus from the dead. He’s not mourning Lazarus. What’s He troubled by? He hates death. It makes Him angry. That’s part of it.

The other part is that He’s troubled that maybe they still don’t fully believe who He is. They say they believe; they have the right theology. They recognize that He could have healed Lazarus while He was still alive, but now it’s too late. It’s too late for God now.

You might be thinking right now, It’s too late for Him to heal my marriage. It’s too late for me now to have that relationship restored. It’s too late for me. I have lost my career. I have lost my family. I’m addicted. I’m an alcoholic. I’m a drug addict. I’m addicted to this. I have this bad habit. I’ve ruined my life. It’s too late for me.

Jesus might be disturbed that they don’t recognize that resurrection has just walked into the graveyard. He might be upset about that. Do they even know who I am? There’s no death allowed around me. Maybe, that’s it.

The Bible doesn’t say what the sound was. Verse 35 says, “Jesus wept.” Now, this is a different word than the word, “weeping.” The Greek word for “weeping” was “wailing an audible loud sound.” The Greek word for “wept” was the shedding of tears. He felt their pain. He was moved by Mary and the mourners.

He loves us. He understands us. He’s not distant but near. You can trust Him. He knows you. Paul prayed like this in Ephesians 3:19 (NLT) “May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” His love is too great to fully understand, but he prays that you start getting a better glimpse of it. Jesus loves you and He understands you.

The prophet Isaiah was given a revelation of Jesus, a revelation of the Messiah. He writes this in Isaiah 53:3-5 (ESV) “He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; …Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows… he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed.”

This is our Jesus. He understands us. He knows us. He wants to heal and comfort us. Oh, if you would only trust Him. Mary’s grief is from the heart. Yet, she seems to have a trust issue.

This past week, I was somewhat inundated by people calling or dropping by the office to talk to me about the first sermon. I don’t know what I’m doing to myself with this one. There was a similarity to how all of these people would approach me. They’d say ’Pastor , I need to talk to you about that sermon. I haven’t been able to sleep since I heard it. There was a part of it that really affected me.’ I have to say to him that it was the Lord doing that. It wasn’t my sermon. Our talks all had this common thread, ‘Pastor, I have trust issues. It was really hard for me to come in and talk to you today. It was really hard for me to call you. It was hard for me to even email you and admit this, but when you told the story about your brother, when you revealed what a mess you are in this other area of your life, I felt like, if you can tell me your junk, I guess I can tell you my junk. But, I have trust issues.’

Do you have trust issues? Are you willing to trust your grief to the Lord, release it to Him and be willing to say it out in front of others, other believers? The more you bottle it up, the more it eats you alive. Some of you have trust issues. Look to Jesus. Trust in Jesus. He understands you. But I’m a mess. He understands you. He knows you. He weeps when you weep.

This leads us to the third step. We’ve said that Jesus is calling us to believe in Him as the only source of our comfort. The only One who can rescue us, that we can trust Him because He loves us and understands us. Then, finally:

3. Cry out to Jesus to turn your mourning into dancing.

When was the last time you felt like dancing? Now, some of you have different reasons for not feeling like dancing. It might be that your body is not feeling like it , but He’s calling us here to something. He’s calling us to cry out to Him.

We’re in the final part. We’ve talked about Martha; we’ve talked about Mary. We’ve talked about the woman full of words and practicality and the woman full of tears and from the heart. Now, let’s talk about the dead guy. He’s the only one left. Is there any hope for Lazarus? That’s what the last part of the story is about. It’s an interesting part of the story because everyone, except Jesus, thinks it’s too late for Lazarus.

They walk out to the graveyard. Jesus says, “Show me where they laid him.” Jesus tells them to move the stone. Practical Martha speaks again, “Lord, by this time there will be an odor, for he has been dead four days.” Or, as the, the KJV version says, “he stinketh.”

My situation is so dead that it stinks. My marriage, my career, my dreams…fill in the blank. It’s already dead. It’s already decomposing. There’s no way to put life back in it again.

Martha had already said, ‘Yes Lord, I believe. Yes, Lord, I believe you’re the Christ. You’re the son of God. Yes, lord, I believe,’ but there was still a disconnect. She still needed to grow in her belief.

What about you? Do you believe that all things are possible with God? Do you believe that God can restore the years that the locusts have eaten? Do you believe this or are you still trying to do it in your own strength? Will you cry out, because to mourn means to cry out to Jesus. Cry out and say, ‘I need a rescue here and I believe You can do it.’

Jesus could have moved the stone Himself. He was an apprentice to a carpenter named Joseph. He could have walked over there and moved the stone. Why did He ask them to do it? Because they needed to.

You’ve seen the painting of Jesus standing at the door knocking. Someone met the artist and said to him, “You know, it’s a great painting, but you left out the door knob. You forgot to put the door knob on the door.” The artist replies to him, “No, I didn’t. That represents our heart. The door knob is on the inside. Jesus is knocking. He’s not going to kick the door in.”

Notice, that Jesus didn’t go straight to the house when He got to Bethany. He stood outside. He waited for Mary to come to Him and fall at his feet. He’s there. He’s knocking. He wants us to take a step of faith. Move the stone.

What is the “stone” that is covering your heart today? You have it locked away. You won’t go ahead and grieve it.You can’t grieve it because it’s your identity now. Hanging on to that thing is who you are. Move the “stone.” Cry out.

Verse 38 surprises us. He goes to the graveyard and then it says in verse 38, “Then Jesus, deeply moved again, came to the tomb. It was a cave, and a stone lay against it.” In other words, He makes that sound again. Why is He making the sound now? He hates graveyards. He’s life; He’s resurrection and life. He says, “Lazarus come forth” and Lazarus does because Jesus is life. He brings Lazarus back to life.

As an old preacher once said, “It’s a good thing that Jesus called Jesus by name, else, the whole graveyard would burst open because He’s life.” He doesn’t like graveyards. He’s life. He is the resurrection and life. You can cry out to Him.

They didn’t cry out. Martha didn’t cry out. Mary didn’t cry out. Lazarus couldn’t cry out. Lazarus was too far gone. So, Jesus cried out for them.

There’s a Psalm for every attitude or every feeling you have. David writes clearly in his personal diary; there’s 150 of them. Here’s one from Psalm 30:10-11 (ESV) 10 “Hear, O Lord, and be merciful to me! O Lord, be my helper!” 11 You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; you have loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness,”

Talk to the one who can do that; you can’t do that for yourself. There’s no drug. There’s no distraction that can do that for you. He’s the comforter. He’s the true source of comfort, but this blessing begins with mourning. Lord, I’m sorry that I have wasted my life. I’m going to stop thinking about my past. I’ve made some horrible errors in relationships. I’ve got self-inflicted things that I’ve done to myself. Lord, I’m going to cry that out to You. I’m going to trust that You can turn my grief into blessing, my mourning into dancing and my grave clothes into new clothes. I’m going to pray to You.

God promises to comfort. It says in Isaiah 57:18-19 (NLT) I have seen what they do, but I will heal them anyway! I will lead them and comfort those who mourn. Then words of praise will be on their lips. May they have peace, both near and far, for I will heal them all,” says the Lord.

If you want comfort, then mourn; release your grief to Jesus. He promises some things to those that will do this. It says in Joel 2:25 (ESV) “I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten.”

Do you think that you have lost it for good? I’m convinced that God is promising you something here today. You may think it’s too late, but it’s not too late. Do you really know who this Jesus is that is in your presence this morning? Do you know this Jesus that I’m talking to you about today? Cry out to Him, without pride, without self control; just cry out to Him. If you need to ask Him, ‘Where have You been?’ then go ahead. Crawl up in His lap and beat on His chest. He’s strong; He can handle it. Just pour it out.

Finally, admit that He is God and you are not. Whether He tells you the answer or not, you don’t care. You just know that He knows the answer and He is a good God and you trust Him. Cry out to Jesus.

In Isaiah 61:3 (NLT) it says, “To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair.” Exchange your ashes for beauty.

Look what Jesus says . He says in John 11:40 ESV, “Did I not tell you that if you believed you would see the glory of God?” If you would only believe in Me.

There’s one final thought in verse 44. Let’s not miss it. Jesus says one final thing. Here comes Lazarus. He comes out and he’s wrapped in grave clothes, like strips of cloth. You can almost picture a mummy coming out. He turns to the people and He says this final verse, “Unbind him, and let him go.” Jesus could have done it Himself. But the people need to participate at this point; the believers need to come around this one who’s been born again and help him get out of those stinky grave clothes, put on new clothes and get washed and clean.

Jesus invites us into the church, into the fellowship and the community of believers. Christ is the head, but we’re also to be authentic with each other and admit that we need help with this , which means we have to trust each other and we have to be accountable to someone and get help. We can’t keep isolating and trying to fix ourselves.

Last week, we had to admit that we’re powerless and we need a Savior; we need a Rescuer. This week, we need to go ahead and mourn what we have lost. We need to cry it out and ask God to comfort us, so we are no longer in a state of mourning. We have poured it out and now, He’s comforting us.

I would remind you that we have a ministry called Celebrate Recovery. It meets on Thursday nights at 7:00pm. It’s for those who would admit they’re powerless, would cry out to Jesus and be willing to be in a community where they’re honest with each other and help each other to get their stinky grave clothes off and put new clothes on. I would call you to that. Being a believer is not an individual thing. It’s a team thing that you come together, you hear from each other and hold each other accountable.

This leads us to the second principle, based on the Beatitudes, that we’re teaching you. We use the acronym, R.E.C.O.V.E.R.Y. We taught you this one last week – Realize I’m not God. I admit I’m powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and my life is unmanageable. Here’s the E in recovery this week – Earnestly believe that God exists, that Jesus is the only true comforter. I believe that I matter to Him, that He loves me and understands me. He alone has the power to help me recover. If I cry out to Him, He can turn my mourning into dancing.

How about you? Will you stop trying to live life on your own? Would you start recognizing who this Jesus really is and what He can do? The first step, perhaps, is to admit that you need Him. The second step is to go ahead and cry out to Jesus for He cares for you.

Let’s pray. Lord, I pray for the person here today that’s never given their life to You. They’ve never cried out to You and said, ‘Rescue me, save me.’ Is that you my friend? You can do it right now, in your seat in this room or watching at home or if you’re watching in the next room. Jesus is listening. Say that you believe and trust Him and cry out to Him. Pray like this with me, where you’re at, by faith. What matters is that you believe what you’re praying. That you’re talking to Him. ‘Dear Lord Jesus, I’m a sinner. I need a Savior. I believe that You died on the cross for my sins and that You were raised from the grave and that You live today. I believe that. Come and live in me, forgive me of my sin and make me the person You want me to be. I want to be a child of God. I want to follow You as my Lord and Savior.’ If you’re praying that prayer, believing,He’ll save you. The scripture says, “If you confess with your mouth, that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart, that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” Others are here and you have a relationship with Jesus, but you’ve been nursing a grief for years. It’s become part of your identity that’s turned into bitterness. You don’t think you’ll ever be happy again. Right now, would you say? ‘Lord I give you this. I’ve been bottling it up; I’ve been trying to cope with it my own way. I turn it over to You now. I cry out to you, Jesus. Take this, and in its place, give me comfort. Give me beauty in the place of ashes. Give me joy in the place of grief. Give me new clothes in the place of these old clothes. Lord, comfort me. I cry out to You. in Jesus’ name. Amen.